A look through the lens of anger
“‘Be angry, but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give place to the devil”
- Anger is okay sometimes.
- Anger must be resolved soon before it turns into sin.
- Anger can be restrained and controlled.
- If anger is not stopped, Satan can use it against us.
- If anger continues, it opens the door for Satan.
“Let no corrupt word come out of your mouth, but what is good for the necessary edification, in order to give grace to the hearers. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.” (Ephesians 4:29,30)
- Anger can provoke corrupt and sinful words.
- Anger can sadden the Holy Spirit.
- Anger can be controlled and suffocated.
- Anger becomes sin when it produces bitterness.
- Anger must be controlled before it turns into rage.
- Anger must be quenched before causing fights.
- Anger must stop before it gives way to slurs.
- Anger must be subdued before it turns into malice.
- Anger can be controlled through kindness and compassion.
- Anger can be overcome with forgiveness.
“Let all bitterness, anger, wrath, clamor and slander, and all malice be removed from you. Before, be kind to one another, merciful, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ.” (Ephesians 4:31,32)
Questions About Anger
“Is it a sin to get angry?”
No. The initial emotion of anger was given to us by God. But how we respond to and express our anger will determine whether we allow it to become sin. The Bible says:
“‘Be angry, but do not sin; let not the sun go down on your anger.” (Ephesians 4:26)
“How can I avoid feeling guilty when I get angry?”
His anger is a sign that something is not right, as indicated by a red light on the dashboard of his car. Its purpose is to alert you to a course of action, to stop, assess what is happening, and then take appropriate action. Jesus was angry with the hypocritical religious leaders who interpreted the “rest of the Sabbath” to the extreme of wanting to punish with the death penalty an act of healing on that day. As a result, he healed the man with the withered hand on a Sabbath day.
“Then, looking around angrily at them, saddened by the hardness of their hearts, he said to the man: Stretch out your hand. And he stretched it out, and his hand was restored to him whole.” (Mark 3:5)
false belief
“Based on what I believe to be the right thing to do, I have the right to stay angry as long as I want about life’s disappointments.”
Correct Belief
“Since God is the Sovereign of my life and I have entrusted my life to him, I submit my rights to him. The human disappointments that he suffers are opportunities that he will use to make my faith grow and to develop his character in me.”
What are the four sources of anger?
“What does God expect of me when it comes to inappropriate anger?”
God wants us to examine the true source of our anger. Is it hurt, injustice, fear or frustration, or a combination of two or more? Then we must assess whether we are using anger to fill any of our intimate needs for love, recognition, or security.
- Injustice: Have you suffered real or perceived injustice? If so, please assess whether…
Are you using angry, condemning words to make someone feel guilty and obligated to you in some way?
- Hurts: Have you been hurt by someone’s rejection or hurtful words? If that is the case, consider whether…
Are you using anger to intimidate or coerce someone into keeping them in a relationship with you?
- Fear: Has something happened to you that made you afraid? If so, please rate whether…
Are you using anger to dominate and control someone to get your way?
- Frustration: Do you feel frustrated because of an unfulfilled expectation? If that is the case, assess whether…
Are you using angry threats and shameful words to manipulate someone into meeting your demands?
When you examine your heart decide not to use anger to try to get your needs met. Rather, repent and depend more deeply on the Lord, who is the only one who can meet our needs.
“Tremble, and do not sin; Meditate in your heart while you are in bed, and be silent.” (Psalms 4:4)
Do You Have Certain Requirements?
“You should… You have to . . . You need… Don’t even think about it… ” Give up all these demands. Stop believing that you have the “right” to always get your way.
“Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I say: Rejoice!!” (Philippians 4:4)
How to Resolve Anger From the Past
- Acknowledge your uncontrolled anger.
“Every way of man is right in his own opinion; But Jehovah weighs hearts.” (Proverbs 21:2)
- Review the root of anger and its source(s).
“Search me, O God, and know my heart; Test me and knows my thoughts; and see if there be any wicked way in me, and guide me in the way everlasting.” (Psalms 139:23,24)
- Receive God’s love.
“See what love the Father has given us, that we should be called children of God; This is why the world does not know us, because it did not know him.” (1 John 3:1)
- Give up your rights to it.
-Confess that it is a sin to accumulate anger in his heart.
-Give the Lord the desire for revenge from him.
goodbye.
-Ask the Lord to work in the lives of those who have hurt him and change his feelings toward them.
– Deposit the one who hurt you in the hands of the Almighty, and forgive him as he did you!
“Be kind to one another, merciful, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ.” (Ephesians 4:32)
- Rejoice in God’s purpose.
“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son.” (Romans 8:28,29)
- Restore the relationship…when appropriate.
“Therefore, if you bring your gift to the altar, and there you remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go, first reconcile with your brother, and then come and present your gift.” (Matthew 5:23,24)
- Reflect the love of Christ.
“A new commandment I give to you: that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another.” (John 13:34)
How to handle anger in the present
“Anger can become a real danger.”
This saying reflects a painful reality. And since so many times our language has not been tamed, some conversations can get out of control.
- Admit your anger.
“He who covers his sins will not prosper; but he who confesses them and turns away from him will obtain mercy.” (Proverbs 28:13)
- Drop your demands.
Instead of demanding that others meet your needs for love, recognition, and security, learn to depend on the Lord to meet them.
- “Lord, although I would like to be loved by others, I know that you love me unconditionally.”
“I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I extended my mercy to you.” (Jeremiah 31:3)
- “Lord, although I would like to be recognized by those around me, I know that I am important to you.”
“‘For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you the end you hope for.” (Jeremiah 29:11)
- “Lord, although I would like to feel more secure in my relationships with others, I know that I am secure in my relationship with you.”
“Jehovah is with me; I will not fear what man can do to me.” (Psalms 118:6)
- “Lord, I wish that others were aware of my needs, but I know that you have promised to meet them all.”
“All things pertaining to life and godliness have been given us by his divine power, through the knowledge of him who called us by his glory and excellence.” (2 Peter 1:3)
Questions and answers
“Someone I fully trusted hurt me. People want me to forgive that person. But how can I ignore my anger and just forgive him?
Imagine a hook hanging around his neck. Then imagine that attached to that hook is his offender and the pain it caused him. Would you really want to carry that person and all that pain tied to you for the rest of your life?
The Lord wants you to release the anger and hurt it caused you in the past and leave it in his hands. Then release the one who offended you from his emotional hook and place him on God’s. The Lord knows how to deal fairly and effectively with all those who have hurt him in his life. He says:
“‘Vengeance is mine, I will pay, says the Lord.” (Romans 12:19)
Prayer to Release Your Anger
“Lord Jesus, thank you because you care about the pain I feel in my heart. You know that I suffer because of (list all offenses). At this moment I deliver all that pain into your hands, and I voluntarily decide to forgive (person’s name). Right now I release (name of person) from my emotional hook. I trust that in your time and according to your will you will deal with (that person). Lord, thank you for giving me the power to let go of my anger to be free. In your name. Amen.”
“Bearing with one another, and forgiving one another if anyone has a complaint against another. As Christ forgave you.” (Colossians 3:13)