The danger of envy and jealousy…

“For you, brothers, were called to liberty; only do not use freedom as an occasion for the flesh, but serve one another out of love. For all the law in this one word is fulfilled: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. But if you bite and eat each other, take heed that you also do not consume each other. I say, then: Walk in the Spirit, and you will not satisfy the desires of the flesh. Because the desire of the flesh is against the Spirit, and that of the Spirit is against the flesh; and these oppose each other, so that you do not do what you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. And manifest are the works of the flesh, which are: adultery, fornication, filthiness, lasciviousness, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, lawsuits, jealousy, wrath, contentions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, orgies, and things similar to these; about which I warn you, as I have told you before, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, meekness, self-control; against such things there is no law. But those who belong to Christ have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit. Let us not become vainglorious, irritating one another, envying one another.” (Galatians 5:13,26)

“Envy is the worst disease of humanity.” —Euripides

“Is envy always bad?”

Yes. The Scriptures never refer to it in a positive way. God is never said to be envious.

“Now then, on the day of the festival the governor used to release a prisoner to the people, whoever they wanted. And then they had a famous prisoner named Barrabás. So when they were gathered together, Pilate said to them, “Whom do you want me to release for you: Barabbas, or Jesus, who is called the Christ?” For he knew that out of envy they had handed him over.” (Matthew 27:15,18)

“Is jealousy always bad?”

No. It is normal and natural for jealousy to arise when infidelity threatens a meaningful and committed relationship.

“This is the law of jealousy, when the woman commits infidelity against her husband, and defiles herself; or of the husband over whom she passes a spirit of jealousy, and he is jealous of her wife; then he shall present it before the Lord, and the priest shall execute all this law on it. The man will be free from iniquity, and the woman will bear her sin.” (Numbers 5:29,31)

“Because I am jealous for you with the jealousy of God; for I have betrothed you to one husband, to present you as a pure virgin to Christ. But I fear that as the serpent with her cunning deceived Eve, your senses will be somehow misled from sincere fidelity to Christ. (2 Corinthians 11:2,3)

Costumes that mask envy and jealousy

  • Feign apathy or indifference towards people or situations.
  • Avoid problems or people that could make us envious or jealous.
  • Offering false praise and congratulations.
  • Offer unnecessary or negative information about others.
  • Project jealousy or envy onto others.

Envy

  • Promotes envy in others
  • Pretends to put others down
  • Causes desire to take revenge on others
  • Seeing the success of others, internal pain occurs
  • Desire to excel
  • Wishes and desires not covered
  • Seek self-exaltation

“A peaceful heart is the life of the flesh; But envy rots the bones”. (Proverbs 14:30)

Jealousy

  • Criticize others
  • Have very personal expectations
  • There is anxiety and anger at the potential loss
  • It is leaning on the identity of others
  • Being overly possessive of others
  • Unable to trust God
  • Distrust the normal behavior of others

“Cruel is wrath, and impetuous is fury; but who can stand before envy?” (Proverbs 27:4)

key verse to memorize

“I’m not saying this because I have a shortage, because I’ve learned to be content, whatever my situation.” (Philippians 4:11)

Key passage to read and meditate

Galatians 5:13,26

How to replace destructive emotions

Accept your feelings and use them as signals to make changes. (James 3:14)

Recognize the source of those emotions. (James 3:15,16)

  • Envy is the product of desire and sinful patterns. (Luke 12:15)
  • Jealousy is a product of love and is a natural emotion, but is it pious or selfish? (2 Corinthians 11:2)

Agape love says that you can control your natural jealousy and envy. (Galatians 5:13,14)

  • Agape love is a commitment that seeks the maximum good of the other. (John 15:12)
  • Agape love prevents us from making idols of other people. (Deuteronomy 6:5)

Pray, pray, pray.

Change your focus and seek to please Christ and not the desires of others.

“Love is long-suffering, it is benign; love is not envious, love is not boastful, it is not puffed up; He does not do anything wrong, he does not seek his own, he does not get irritated, he does not hold a grudge.” (1 Corinthians 13:4,5)

The answer to jealousy—speak the truth in love

Confront with love—talk with love.

Try to discover the source of jealousy, whether they are pious or selfish.

Decide if the jealousy is justified or a product of your imagination.

Allow the expression of pain without blaming anyone.

Apologize for any possible offense, but don’t get defensive.

Affirm the jealous person by declaring his value, praise and encourage him.

Make a plan together.

Stay away from anyone who displays open hatred or destructive manipulation.

“But by following the truth in love, let us grow up in everything into him who is the head, that is, Christ.” (Ephesians 4:15)